confession.

some things got stirred up in me today..things i thought i've dealt with.

i realized something about myself last week that scared me...and then i lived this week as if nothing changed.
that scared me even more. do you do this? am i the only one?

but...
there are some things from my past that are still haunting me...i cannot deny it any longer.

i don't think about these things everyday...and honestly, i thought i had moved passed them...
until i was forced to really face them today...and i realized i still held onto some of that junk....that junk that robbed me of so much.

it took everything in me not to ball my eyes out in a room full of people today. now that takes a lot...(my sister can tell you this). i cry very easily...i don't apologize about that. God made me an emotional/sensitive person. i'm just fine with that....beats being callused/jaded.

but i'm aware now of the hurt that i've been holding onto..the hurt that has been stuffed down...i'm aware now the consequences in my life from holding onto that hurt and not allowing God to take it. i'm aware now of the people i've hurt because of that.

so, i guess this really hasn't been a confession since you have no idea what i'm talking about.
honestly, i'm pretty much an open book and have no problem sharing with all you wonderful people...but some things are better left unsaid in an open setting such as this.

so...there's my confession/non-confession for all three of you who read. ;)